Mr Banner?
by MeltingInHisGoldenEyes
Summary: When Bella and Edward have Biology, Edward hears Mr. Banner's thoughts and isn't happy... then in comes Mike... and Edward meets his nose.
1. Mr Banner?

Disclaimer

_This is a disclaimer for the whole story._

_I am not Stephanie Meyer therefore I do_

_Not own any of the characters in this._

_I wish I did own Edward but sadly I do _

_Not. _

Mr. Banner?

EPOV

I couldn't help but keep secretly glance at Bella. Wow. She was beautiful today. Sometimes I cannot believe my luck. I was taking another quick glance when our eyes met and she quickly turned away blushing. Blushing the most beautiful crimson red I have ever seen, never mind imagined. I couldn't help when a chuckle escaped my lips and soon came the light- what I imagined was supposed to be kept in- chuckle that escaped my Bella's lips. My thoughts were interrupted by Mr. Banner's voice in the distance, "Mr. Cullen, Miss. Swan would you care to explain to the class what you found so amusing?"

At this Bella added on a newer shade of red on her already blushing cheeks as all the class eyes moved from the board to us, at least Bella couldn't here there thoughts, ARGH, that stupid Mike Newton, of course Bella wasn't imagining kissing him... that was a very distant possibility. However, Jessica was worse, me dumping Bella for her? Firstly, why would we both be chuckling if anything Bella would probably be crying, wait, I would probably be doing my normal dry sobbing if I had to brake up with Bella again...wait I mustn't think about last year... and secondly, Bella or Jessica? There was no competition. I couldn't help but let another chuckle escape my lips just thinking how Jessica could be so dumb as to believe that.

"Mr. Cullen would you like to please explain to the class what was so amusing, for Miss. Swan seems to be more pre occupied at looking at her work" Mr. Banner persisted smiling as he said Bella's name. What was wrong with this man? All his thoughts were based on the fact that Bella was now cowering over the table in a low cut black top which he thought 'compliment her breasts very well'! But when visuals started popping into his head about keeping her after class to 'do something Bella would enjoy' as he put it. I had to speak up.

"Sir, I was just explaining to Bella some of the more exciting things you could learn in biology which I could tutor her in later."

When I said this I saw Bella's face lift up to stare at me but then look back down at her book, also since her old blush had been removed, I chuckled once again to see her pale cheeks become flooded with a most adoring red. I kept on my crooked smile that Bella loved, for if she decided to look up again. However, I knew my happiness couldn't last as I heard more of Mr. Banner's sick, perverted thoughts. 'I could show her some real fun things to do with biology, physics and chemistry. I have so much more 

experience in more physical interactions than Mr. Cullen over there has. I could show here a real man' I was about the gag and then again came the visuals. But this time Bella was naked... NAKED! EVEN I HAVEN'T SEEN THAT YET AND SHE WAS MY FIANCÉE! I could see Mr. Banner nibbling on his lip at the front of the class and as Bella's, My Bella's, body lowers itself to straddle his newly bare body and her lips moving down to caress with his and as in front of the whole class his hand move down from above his desk to the buckle of his belt, I had to stop him.

"But, I suppose I could also tutor her in the importance of physics and chemistry at the same time, what do you think sir?" At this I got kicked under the table as Bella's cheeks were now the newly acquainted colour of a ruby. But I was glad when Mr. Banner's hand was placed back on his desk as the rest of the class began to listen in on his reply. I still couldn't manage to block out Mike's visuals of Bella's 'biology, physics and chemistry tutoring 'Mike style'' as he put it. I inwardly shivered but was brought back to reality when I heard Mr. Banner's response, "Mr. Cullen, if Miss. Swan ever needed extra tutoring, I am her teacher and would be more than willing to help her in any of the science subjects, whether it be physical, chemistry or biology." What did he just say? And did h just _purr _the word chemistry at Bella?! In front of everyone! As, once again their eyes rested on me even Bella's, I stole a quick glance her eyes to see them pleading me to come back with a better response which would stop Mr. Banner I couldn't let her down.

"Mr. Banner, I am sure Bella would love to have more tutoring from me. I have tutored her in mostly chemistry from the start of the week when she began to think she wanted to lose her _vir-_, sorry, I mean began to think she was having trouble in those subjects" I steadily replied, I knew I had succeeded for Bella when her cheeks stopped flaming and became more of a crimson again and a faint smile appeared on her lushes lips. Even Mikes thoughts stopped as did everyone else's including Mr. Banner's as the stares moved from me to Mr. Banner. While all at once the whole class was asking themselves the same thing, 'Lose her what, WHAT DID SHE LOSE? What begins with _vir_? Did he say _vir_ or _var_ if it were _var. _If it were _var_ it could be vase... that's it she lost her vase' where Mike's thought's, what as wrong with that boy? A vase? Jessica's thoughts were similar 'Did Bella just lose her virginity, wow, with _Edward_? I will have to start to give that girl some credit.' Angela seemed disappointed ' If Bella _had _slept with Edward she would have told me, wouldn't she?' I did feel sorry for Angela until I finally heard _his_ thoughts 'Bella? _MY BELLA? _Lost her virginity to _that_ and I thought she loved me. Wait, he didn't say virginity, maybe she lost her pen? That's it she lost her pen! PEN! PEN! PEN, BANNER, PPPPPPPEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNN!' My next chuckle was blocked out by the sound of the bell but still the whole classes eyes were either transfixed on me or Mr. Banner.

"Class is dismissed, please will Miss. Swan stay after I need to talk to her about her lab work," Mr. Banner broke the silence. Bella's eyes looked at me pleadingly but I couldn't do anything I told her I would wait outside and if anything happens I'll come in and save her. At this we both laughed so I left with the other students and waited outside the door already hearing the most disturbing thoughts of Mr. Banner. I wish I had told Bella not to lean over the desk. God, I am going to kill Alice for making her wear that short white skirt with black lace and a black tube top that hugged her every curve. **(Picture on Profile) **

Then his thoughts hit me. She was _defiantly_ leaning over his desk.


	2. Chemistry, Biology and Physics?

Disclaimer

_This is a disclaimer for the whole story._

_I am not Stephanie Meyer therefore I do_

_Not own any of the characters in this._

_I wish I did own Edward but sadly I do _

_Not. _

Chemistry, Biology and Physics?

BPOV

After Edward had left the room, I slowly pushed my books in my bag and strolled over to Mr. Banner's desk where now on top of the desk was mine and Edward's lab study. If it was mine and Edward's why wasn't Edward in here?

"Miss. Swan, I was hoping you could read me some of the answers you have written for the questions, I could seem to be able to read them. He turned the sheet round and placed it in front of himself. My eyesight isn't that good so I had to bend of the desk to see what I had written. God, I'm going to kill Alice for making me wear this outfit, she said it make me look hot. But no it didn't it make me look like Alice not Bella but I suppose I'm going to have to live with that. For eternity. I inwardly smiled thinking about eternity with Edward. When I was interrupted my Mr. Banner, "Can you not read it either Miss. Swan? Is it Edward's writing I would call him in but I suppose we are _all alone_"

What the HELL! Was this man on about? Was he flirting with me? How old was he? 90? I couldn't help but notice through my frustration that his eyes wear flickering from my lab work to my cleavage. What a perve. Edward is going to go mad when I tell him. Maybe he can hear r. Banner's thoughts. I don't even want to think of what they are, as his eyes were now transfixed on my breasts not even making an effort to look elsewhere.

"No, sir I can read it I was just wondering why I was brought in to read this when Edward can probably read my handwriting better than I can. You know the whole couple; know everything about each other's rule." I replied with a smile as his eyes finally moved back to my work.

"Well, I suppose so. Would you care to read your answer to question 3 to me, please." Mr. Banner asked steadily. As my eyes looked through question 3 I saw it was the only question on the sheet that had to do with reproduction and about how men ejaculate. Wow, this man was pathetic and sick. As I started reading the answer out loud I swear I heard a repeated bang coming from outside but I jst ignored it and continued reading.

"Thank you Miss. Swan that has made _everything _more clear. Could I talk to you about something other than science with you for a minute at the most?" his eyes looked at me pleadingly and I couldn't say no so I settled on the short answer of 'yes'.

"I was wondering if I could talk to you about your relationship with Mr. Cullen." What did he just say? I couldn't be rude so I said 'yes' again only to hear the banging outside stop abruptly.

"Well, don't you think that you and Mr. Cullen are going too fast with your relationship. Getting married is a big commitment and unless you are truly in love with someone you should not do it. Also, if you truly were in love you wouldn't need to get married you could wait. You should also wait before, how did Mr. Cullen put it? _Chemistry, Biology and Physics?_ You never know you might find that you truly love someone else and you have wasted your first...erm... chemistry, biology and physics tutoring with the wrong person. Do you understand, _Bella?"_ I was speechless. Firstly, he just called me by my first name. He never does that. Secondly, What was he trying to imply with his whole chemistry, biology and physics speech. Thirdly, why on earth was he questioning me about mine and Edward's engagement? Saying I may not be truly in love with Edward and there is someone else out there for me!

"Sir, thank you for your views but I am very much in love with Edward and am more than willing to spend the rest of my life with him and no-one else. Even if I did fall in love with anyone else which I won't. I would never leave Edward; he is my life and my love. I am ready to make the big commitment of getting married and about _the chemistry, biology and physics tutoring_ I have already made my decision about that and so has Edward. But thank you for caring." I finished and turned to leave before I felt a hand on my arm that turned me back around to face Mr. Banner again.

"I'm sorry if I upset you, Miss. Swan. But I do think you are too young to become a Mrs. Cullen and I will be sure to make my views known to Mr. Cullen before you two venture into a life you cannot leave." Mr. Banner persisted. "Thank you, Miss. Swan for your time and I hope you can think about what I said. Please do not take a leaf out of your mother and fathers book and get married too young and regret it. I am sure that Mr. Swan is not too thrilled about you getting married this young. Even after what Edward did last year. Even the teachers noticed you die last year and none of us want that to happen again." Mr. Banner stated. He had just mentioned what none of either of mine or Edward's family had mentioned ever since the engagement. Charlie had come to terms with the fact that the wedding was happening whether or not he was going to be the one that lead me down the aisle and Rene didn't take to the idea at first but has said to me just yesterday that she sees how Edward and I look at each other, she says it is like we have been married are whole lives already and doesn't want to stop that from actually happening.

"I'm sorry sir but you have got the situation totally upside down. My mother and father couldn't be more thrilled to know that I have found someone I love so much and that they love me so much back and last year was a misunderstanding. Edward had to leave but didn't want to and has been trying to regain my trust ever since but he has had it ever since he stepped back into my life again. Please may I be excused sir?" I was getting annoyed at Mr. Banner for even considering asking me these questions never mind actually saying them.

"Yes, you can Miss. Swan but please think of what I said," responded Mr. Banner. So I turned to leave picked up my bag from the floor and made my way out the door making sure I didn't trip so I didn't have to stay any longer with Mr. Banner.

When I reached the door I opened it only to see that he wasn't there. Where the hell was Edward?


	3. You dare say that name

Disclaimer

_This is a disclaimer for the whole story._

_I am not Stephanie Meyer therefore I do_

_Not own any of the characters in this._

_I wish I did own Edward but sadly I do _

_Not. _

Why the hell are you thinking perverted thoughts about my fiancée?

EPOV

I couldn't even hear what they were saying through the lab door but I knew it couldn't be good. _His thoughts. His pictures._ They all made me want to throw up in my own mouth. Why had I said all of that. I knew Bella was embarrassed and I never speak to teachers like that, maybe that's why everyone was more interested than if it was just any other student. That wasn't Edward Cullen in that room. That was a _very_ jealous Edward Cullen. Of all the people I could be jealous of I was jealous of a teacher. Not even one of the good-looking ones either but _Mr. Banner!_ Now Bella was in a room alone with him, alone. I inwardly shivered.

Pictures of Bella's cleavage were appearing in my head. I knew they had come from Mr. Banner. I started humming Hannah Montana in my head. Wow. Emmett has seriously been rubbing off on me. Wait. Bella think about, Bella I have to.

Not so soon after I had started to think about Bella, I couldn't stop. I was totally away from the world. My head in the clouds. Bella's laugh. Bella's touch. Bella's kisses. The objects I would never take for granted. Then in my thoughts entered _him, _Jacob Black. Their kiss, her laugh when she was around him, they way she always said they were just friends. But_ she loved him!_ She had told him herself, words out of her mouth, and he didn't force her to say them. Did she really mean those words when she was talking to me? Or did she just picture him? Would he always be on her mind? Even in 100 years after I have turned her into one of us. Will she wonder what would have happened if she had chosen him. Had children, _died?_

I started banging my head off the wall. I couldn't stand my thoughts. They would always trail off and end with Bella being much happier with Jacob. She could cliff diving without me making her jump with an oxygen tank and a water proof cover over her phone. Or just them growing old together, loving each other until death. Something we could never do.

'_Ejaculation is the process in which a man...' _I heard Bella's voice say from the opposite the side of the door and couldn't help but bang my head harder off the wall. I was sure there was a dint by now. Wait. _Why was Bella talking about ejaculation with Mr. Banner?_

'_This is so good she doesn't even look like she realises she making me so horny, just watching her bend slightly over the desk, wearing that skirt and talking about ejaculation. I only wish we were somewhere _

_more quiet not in my classroom at school, we could have so much more fun. Teach her about a real man not a scrawny excuse for a man that is her boyfriend,' _FIANCEE!_ ' if only, if only.' _Mr. Banner was literally screaming at me I couldn't take it anymore. But I couldn't leave Bella to handle, _that. _If things got out of hand I would just have to stick it out and make sure I didn't kill the next passing person. Human, vampire or werewolf.

_Breath Edward, just breath. It will all be over soon. He can't keep her in there all lunch._

'_Little more, get her a little angrier and maybe she will start bouncing a little more on the spot. Watch that skirt, little more, little more then I will let her go and I can have some _alone_ time in my closet. That will be enough for a lifetime. W-O-W', _I stopped the banging of my head and ran for it. As far away as possible, I thought I could stand it but I can't.

"Hey Edward, where's _Bella?" _Who just _purred_ Bella's name? I stopped abruptly and turned around as his thought's of Bella popped in his head in underwear, at least she was more covered than what she was wearing in Mr. Banner's little fantasy. Stop thinking about that Edward. I saw Mike's face turn to shock as I turned around he was a foot away, his shock turned into a smirk.

'_I bet he's just mad because she dumped him or called of the marriage. I knew she would do this. She had it bad for the motorbike guy... what was his name again. Oh yeah, Jac-' Before his thoughts could finish_ off the name. I punched him. Smack bam on the nose as I heard a crunch I couldn't stay there, Mike's thoughts and Mr. Banner's were now mixing together, I had to run. As far away from them both as possible without being too far from Bella. That would be hard, I wanted to be with Bella but she was too near them both. I stopped when I saw the perfect place to go, not to far from Bella but where I couldn't hear their thoughts and as I pulled back the door and entered, I couldn't hear anyone's thoughts other than my own and they were of Bella, I could feel her here with me.

We were finally alone. Just Bella and Edward. How I wish it would be for eternity.

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_Thanks for reading. I was thinking about starting another fanfic and need to know about the American school years/ grades like seniors and juniors and when prom is. I am British and don't understand it, not that I'm using that as an excuse! _

_Thanks_

_Lots of hugs,_

_edward.x.cullen.x.forever _

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	4. What the hell happened to your nose?

Disclaimer

_This is a disclaimer for the whole story._

_I am not Stephanie Meyer therefore I do_

_Not own any of the characters in this._

_I wish I did own Edward but sadly I do _

_Not. _

What the hell happened to your nose?

BPOV

I dedicate this chapter to the song 'Circle. Square. Triangle. By Test Icicles' I haven't stopped listening to it every since I heard it. On with the fanfic...

_Where the hell was Edward?_

Then I heard the faint mutters of voices, I couldn't tell what they were saying or whose they were all I heard was a faint humming. I started walking in that direction. Maybe it was Edward. But then the voices stopped only to be replaced by a thud and a quick dash of footsteps. I ran to where I heard the bang only to see Mike sprawled across the floor holding his nose and _crying?_

"Mike what the hell happened?" I quickly rushed to his side and as he turned to me I saw his nose, it was pushed slightly back into his face and was bent to the left with blood running out of it in every direction.

"Who did this to you, what the hell happened to your nose?" I asked quickly but I already knew the answer. Edward. I don't think anyone else would have had enough power to push a nose so far back into someone's head. Also, Alice had already given me a clue.

I shouldn't have left him outside by himself. He has been very protective lately, if he even heard a thought about me, good or bad, his eyes would quickly look around the room to find the culprit then he would be silent for a few minutes. I always joked to Alice about how he was planning how to get his revenge. However, Alice would never laugh she had a shocked look on her face like she had just saw a vision of what he would do.

_-Flashback-_

"_So... what happened at school today, anything exciting?" She asked bound up and down on her bed._

"_Well, Edward did another one of his stunts. Do you see any visions of Edward killing anyone?" I joked. But still slightly curious if Edward was planning people's deaths after what I supposed was him listening to someone's thoughts, mainly Mike, Eric and Tyler got the worst and more frequent glares but some random guys I didn't even know also got the eyeful of Edward._

"_Who is it?" Alice asked still bouncing. Like she knew something. _

_Now I was curious. _

"_Mike" I replied quickly. Maybe too quickly, Alice's was staring me down, "I am just wondering."_

_Her eyes flashed off, she was looking straight through me, a vision. When she stopped her mouth was open and she said just 3 words to get me worried._

"_That must hurt." Wincing slightly as she said it, at this she quickly danced out of the house before I could question her. _

_-End of Flashback-_

"YOUR STUPID FIANCEE WAS THE ONE WHO DID THIS TO ME." He shouted spitting all over my face but then I heard him mumble, "I don't see why she doesn't just get married to me I wouldn't try and kill someone if they said hello to me."

"Oh my god, It doesn't look that bad does it I have to go apply for a modelling job tonight" Mike whined while trying to look at his nose, all he accomplished was looking like a total idiot. Crossing his eyes and talking about modelling. I had to bite my like so I didn't make a comment about the modelling or started laughing at the sight unfolding in front of me. The tears were still rolling down his face even though I could sense he had been trying to act tough when I got here. Mike tough? Ha. That's nearly as impossible as a sunny year in Forks, and I have to state that that is impossible.

"I'm sure they will understand. Also, I'm sure Edward didn't mean it, I'm sure he was just a bit pissed, that's all. Please forgive him? For me?" I pleaded with him fluttering my eyelashes at the same time. I know from passed experiences that that's what wins him over.

"Sure, as long as you do one thing for me first and it's not calling of the wedding." Oh ok then I'll do it as long as it's not that. I thought sarcastically. What was up with this boy? He was probably going to asked me to flash for him. It's the only action he's going to get for at least the next 40 years. I inwardly chuckled. But I still answered 'It depends to see what you want' I was curious about what he would ask.

" A kiss" Mike answered, seeming proud of himself. Well a kiss couldn't be that bad as long as no tong- I was quickly cut off by Mike- "with tongues." TONGUES! I'm sure Edward wouldn't mind being in trouble for once. I hoped to myself but knew he really liked his clean record and I knew then I had to do it.

"Fine" I huffed, "But you can't tell anyone, I mean anyone," the smirk from his face still hadn't left so I quickly added, "if you tell anyone I will get Edward on you... again." His smirk quickly vanished at the mention of his name. Awww, I was so proud of him. That will earn him an extra kiss from me when I finally find him, I huffed to myself, I could get used to this whole mention Edwards name, Mike backs away thing.

As I leaned closer I tried to imagine he was Edward though it didn't work all I got was the stench as off fish and liquorice, I hate liquorice. I closed my eyes and leaner in further only to feel his arms wrap around my waist and push me in faster. As our lips collided he didn't kiss me, he opened up my mouth even if I was reluctant by literally sucking off my lips, he was licking the insides of my mouth like a dog his tongue going further down my throat and that's when I felt it coming up.

My Breakfast.

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Thanks for reading, next chapter will include Alice at lunch having visions of the whole event.

Thanks if you reviewed, I love you all. Sorry about the shortness of the chapter the next chapter will be really long!

Lots of Hugs,

edward.x.cullen.x.forever

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	5. Oh my gawd Is he secretly a wolf?

Disclaimer

_This is a disclaimer for the whole story._

_I am not Stephanie Meyer therefore I do_

_Not own any of the characters in this._

_I wish I did own Edward but sadly I do _

_Not. _

Oh my gawd... Is he secretly a wolf?

APOV

I dedicate this chapter to the song 'Unconditional by The Bravery' it is the best song ever... thanks for reviewing. Now... on with Alice and Mike the dog!

I was daydreaming about my shopping trip with Bella we were going to have tonight when I remembered the funny vision I had. I love Edward. Mike had been getting on my nerves so much lately. He nearly made Bella leave the mall! Only after 3 hours and 23 minutes of shopping, even though she promised 4 hours! He had spotted her in Victoria's Secret and made a surprise visit to her when she came out of the dressing rooms in the one baby doll she chose that I liked! Fate had it's evil ways.

I was trying don't to laugh at the vision replying in my head, exactly as I recalled it. WHAM! HA! That'll to teach him not to mess with my family. Thinking of Edward. Where is he? Wait. Where is Bella? I started pondering with myself.

I was about the ask when I was beat to it. "Where the Hell is Edward and Be..." Emmett's voice suddenly stopped and he looked proud. What did Emmett have to be proud about. Oh MY Gawd. Bella and Edward wouldn't do that at school. Bella told me that was the one place that she would never do _that_. But she did say the best place would be his piano. Maybe they went home? Ew! Why am I thinking such thoughts!

"That's disgusting Emmett I'm sure there is a more reasonable explanation. Bella said that the last place she would do _that_ was at school." I said still wondering what they were doing.

"Sure, sis, but we all know how fun it is to do it at school. Ain't that right Rosie?" With that Emmett got a smack on the head but Rose quickly whispered a small 'yes' which caused our table to erupt into laughter. Everyone's eyes looked over we ignored them. We had gotten used to all the stares over the years. Then I heard Jessica, I bet that slut Bella is taking Banner up on his offer of Biology, Physics and Chemistry lessons and Edward is off trying to find me. Jessica was talking to Lauren who simply nodded through the speech. _Biology, Physics and Chemistry Lessons? _What was she on about. When I heard the next sentence I erupted into a new fit of hysterical laughter.

"Wait, Where's Mike?" Jessica asked looking around soon joined by the whole of their table. Jasper was trying to figure out what was so funny and Emmett was getting annoyed about not being to not be able to laugh at it too. That's when I got the best vision I have ever seen.

_-Vision-_

_Edward was sitting at his desk glaring at Mr. Banner. He let out a small chuckle after looking at Bella._

_When Mr. Banner asked, "Mr. Cullen, Miss. Swan would you care to explain to the class what you found so amusing?"_

_At this Bella added on a newer shade of red I found this very amusing. But then saw a look of distaste on Edward's face as he glared between Mike and Jessica and then back at Mr. Banner. He chuckled again... why was he chuckling? Edward never chuckles. _

_Mr. Banner pressed Edward further by saying, "Mr. Cullen would you like to please explain to the class what was so amusing, for Miss. Swan seems to be more pre occupied at looking at her work" Ha. I reckon I know he smiled when he used Bella's first name. First name? He never uses a pupil's first name. I don't want to even know what he is thinking. Poor Edward. But I couldn't hold in my next lap of hysterical laughter when I felt jasper shake me. I was not coming out of this vision until this vision is over._

"_Sir, I was just explaining to Bella some of the more exciting things you could learn in biology which I could tutor her in later." EDWARD! Did Edward just say that to a teacher. W-O-W!_

_Edward continued quickly, too quickly, "But, I suppose I could also tutor her in the importance of physics and chemistry at the same time, what do you think sir?" _

_I heard Mr. Banner's response, "Mr. Cullen, if Miss. Swan ever needed extra tutoring, I am her teacher and would be more than willing to help her in any of the science subjects, whether it be physical, chemistry or biology." Oh My Gawd. I can't breath. Not that I need to but Mr. Banner just PURRED Bella's name, laughter was taking over my body and I could feel myself fall on the floor before jasper could catch me._

"_Mr. Banner, I am sure Bella would love to have more tutoring from me. I have tutored her in mostly chemistry from the start of the week when she began to think she wanted to lose her vir-, sorry, I mean began to think she was having trouble in those subjects" He steadily replied, I taught him well. _

_The different faces were too funny Mike looked sad, Jessica looked impressed but Mr. Banner's was too funny he had a mixture of anger, disbelief and hurt on his face. This was too much!_

_The bell rang before it could continue, and I was starting to enjoy this! _

"_Class is dismissed, please will Miss. Swan stay after I need to talk to her about her lab work," Mr. Banner broke the silence. Bella and Edward had a conversation I couldn't hear but it ended in them laughing so it had to have been good. Edward Left and Bella was alone with Mr. Banner. I shivered._

_After Edward had left the room, Bella put her books in her bag and walked over to his desk looking scared._

"_Miss. Swan, I was hoping you could read me some of the answers you have written for the questions, I could seem to be able to read them." After a a few seconds Mr. Banner asked, "Can you not read it either Miss. Swan? Is it Edward's writing I would call him in but I suppose we are all alone"_

_What the HELL! Was this man on about? Was he flirting with Bella? Oh no this is too good!_

"_No, sir I can read it I was just wondering why I was brought in to read this when Edward can probably read my handwriting better than I can. You know the whole couple; know everything about each other's rule." She replied, not even looking scared anymore but looked like she was going to be sick after she looked at the paper ._

"_Well, I suppose so. Would you care to read your answer to question 3 to me, please." Mr. Banner asked. As Bella started to read the answer I realised she was reading about reproduction and how men ejactulate. I was shocked but then burst into another hysterical laughing fit and could hear Jasper's scared voice in the background. In the room I could hear a faint banging. But that wondering was interrupted when Mr Banner replied._

"_Thank you Miss. Swan that has made everything more clear. Could I talk to you about something other than science with you for a minute at the most?" He just purred again. This was sad. But HILARIOUS! _

"_I was wondering if I could talk to you about your relationship with Mr. Cullen." Edward? Why would this pervert want to talk about Edward. While, might I add, staring at her cleavage!_

"_Well, don't you think that you and Mr. Cullen are going too fast with your relationship. Getting married is a big commitment and unless you are truly in love with someone you should not do it. Also, if you truly were in love you wouldn't need to get married you could wait. You should also wait before, how did Mr. Cullen put it? Chemistry, Biology and Physics? You never know you might find that you truly love someone else and you have wasted your first...erm... chemistry, biology and physics tutoring with the wrong person. Do you understand, Bella?" I was speechless. But still laughing._

"_Sir, thank you for your views but I am very much in love with Edward and am more than willing to spend the rest of my life with him and no-one else. Even if I did fall in love with anyone else which I won't. I would never leave Edward; he is my life and my love. I am ready to make the big commitment of getting married and about the chemistry, biology and physics tutoring I have already made my decision about that and so has Edward. But thank you for caring." She finished and I was proud of her._

"_I'm sorry if I upset you, Miss. Swan. But I do think you are too young to become a Mrs. Cullen and I will be sure to make my views known to Mr. Cullen before you two venture into a life you cannot leave." Mr. Banner persisted. "Thank you, Miss. Swan for your time and I hope you can think about what I said. Please do not take a leaf out of your mother and fathers book and get married too young and regret it. I am sure that Mr. Swan is not too thrilled about you getting married this young. Even after what Edward _

_did last year. Even the teachers noticed you die last year and none of us want that to happen again." Mr. Banner stated. _

"_I'm sorry sir but you have got the situation totally upside down. My mother and father couldn't be more thrilled to know that I have found someone I love so much and that they love me so much back and last year was a misunderstanding. Edward had to leave but didn't want to and has been trying to regain my trust ever since but he has had it ever since he stepped back into my life again. Please may I be excused sir?" GO BELLA! YOU TELL HIS PERVERTED ASS!_

"_Yes, you can Miss. Swan but please think of what I said," responded Mr. Banner. She turned to leave but I was already somewhere else. In the hall outside the classroom I could see Edward coming out of the door and leaning against the wall. _

_You couldn't hear what was going on inside the classroom. But Edward looked like he was going to be sick, if he could. A few minutes later Edward was singing Hannah Montana. Edward? Hannah Montana? Something bad was happening inside that room that I couldn't see when I was in there. He had an agitated look on his face and he started banging his head off the wall. So that was the banging I heard. I then heard Bella's faint voice through the wall, 'Ejaculation is the process in which a man...' Why did that have to be the only thing we could hear outside? Edward started banging his head off the wall and had been making a bigger and bigger dent in the wall. _

_Suddenly, Edward had stopped banging his head off the wall and legged it. I kept up easily. He was running at human speed. _

"_Hey Edward, where's Bella?" Mike just PURRED Bella's name. I'm so excited. I can tell Edward's going to do it when he saw the smirk on Mike's face. You could tell Mike was thinking something. I couldn't see this in my vision maybe what he was thinking was the thing that got Edward to pop! Wham! Edward punched Mike! Edward punched Mike! Edward punched Mike! Edward punched Mike! Edward punched Mike! I started chanting in my head and probably shouting out loud in the lunch hall while jumping up and down. I hadn't even noticed the crunch and Mike fall on the floor crying while Edward ran for it. He was running at vampire speed now. I would never keep up so I just laughed at Mike rolling on the floor. Grabbing His bloodshed nose that was bent in all directions. I love Edward. _

_Then Bella came running to Mike's side. _

"_Mike what the hell happened?" I she saw his nose and gasped._

"_Who did this to you, what the hell happened to your nose?" She already knew it was Edward by the look on her face I could tell she knew which made me laugh harder. She remembered all the times I just ran away from her after a vision. I should learn to cover that up more. _

"_YOUR STUPID FIANCEE WAS THE ONE WHO DID THIS TO ME." He screamed spitting Bella in the face._

"_Oh my god, It doesn't look that bad does it I have to go apply for a modelling job tonight" Mike whined, I saw Bella's face she was biting her lip. I knew she wanted to laugh. I did. Mike. Modelling? I couldn't even put those to words in the same sentence._

"_I'm sure they will understand. Also, I'm sure Edward didn't mean it, I'm sure he was just a bit pissed, that's all. Please forgive him? For me?" She wanted to keep Edward's record clean that is so sweet. I love this girl. Nearly as much as I love Edward at the moment._

"_Sure, as long as you do one thing for me first and it's not calling of the wedding." This is going to be so good. I held my breath._

" _A kiss" Mike answered, seeming proud of himself. I laughed harder than ever before Bella looked like she was persuaded herself it can't be that bad when Mike interrupted - "with tongues." TONGUES! Hehe. If she does this for Edward I will only take her shopping for 3 hours today and not the 5 she promised. _

"_Fine" she huffed, Oh my gawd... she must really love Edward. This is such a funny and sweet moment at the same time, "But you can't tell anyone, I mean anyone," the smirk from his face still hadn't left so she quickly added, "if you tell anyone I will get Edward on you... again." His smirk quickly vanished at the mention of his name. Awww, I was so proud of her. She has learned how to use other people's weakness' as her strength she is going to fit in well with my family._

_Then she started to lean closer I still hadn't breathed since the last comment, Bella closed her eyes but she crushed to Mike as his arms wrapped around her waist and their lips collided. Bella pulled the most hilarious face as she was forced to open her mouth but Mike sucking her face off! I was already breathing and laughing again but when Mike started to lick Bella's face, Oh my gawd...is Mike secretly a wolf? I went into bigger fits than I ever have before and as he stuck his tongue down her throat she looked like she was going to be sick and then that's when it happened._

_She tried to push him away but he wouldn't let her so the sick flowed out of her mouth into his mouth and out of her nose. He let go just in time for Bella to run off into the distance. I laughed more in this vision that I ever had before and I couldn't stop._

_-End Of Vision-_

"Alice, ALICE! STOP LAUGHING! YOU'RE SCARING ME!" Jasper screamed sounding like he was going to cry. I realised I wasn't in the lunch hall but in one of the classrooms.

"Hi, Jasper!" I said through laughs he quickly embraced me into a hug. I still couldn't stop laughing at my vision and had to tell them all as quickly as possible. So, I pushed away from Jasper and faced Emmett.

"You wanna know what I saw?" I asked through my giggles.

"YYYYYYEEEEESSSS!!" Emmett screamed jumping up and down, obviously excited.

I told them all every detail and by the end we were all in hysterics rolling on the floor until Edward burst through the door.

"WHERE THE HELL IS BELLA!?" he screamed we all stopped rolling on the floor and looked up at his face. I thought there would be angry but no anger just worry. I knew he had heard something that was worrying him. Worrying him a lot.

Where was Bella?

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I started a new story called, 'Beauty and the Nerd?' this time Bella's the beauty but Edward is still a beautiful nerd. They were best friends when they were younger, Edward was the 'hot' nerd and Bella was his chubby best friend. When Edward has to leave he takes Bella's 2 nightmares with him but she never wants to speak or see him again because she will miss him too much. When Bella's mum falls ill, Bella is determined to do the one thing her mother wanted her to do. Lose weight. When she does she becomes beautiful, even Gisele had nothing on her. But Bella and Edward made a promise when they were 10 and sealed it with a kiss...

I know it sounds really stupid but please try it because I am crap at summaries, so you never know it could be good.

Lots of hugs,

edward.x.cullen.x.forever

PLEASE REVIEW!

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	6. Llama Song

Disclaimer

_This is a disclaimer for the whole story._

_I am not Stephanie Meyer therefore I do_

_Not own any of the characters in this._

_I wish I did own Edward but sadly I do _

_Not. _

**Llama Song**

EPOV

Here is a sweet song for this chapter, 'Fishing for a Dream by Turin Brakes'... not that this chapter is sweet or anything :P

The end of lunch bell hadn't rung yet. I got out of my hiding places and walked to the lunch hall the slow way. I couldn't be bothered to pass Mike again. Even though Mr. Banner's thoughts had died slowly down, they still weren't finished but they were more quiet. I could handle that, put them to the back of my mind however when Mike is screaming profanities in his mind it is harder to concentrate on my angel.

I thought that Mr. Banner had let Bella out ages ago because he was having 'alone time' in his cupboard. His thoughts were still on Bella, but I could live with that, she wasn't alone with _him._

As I arrived in the lunch hall I peered over to our table.

It was empty. This is weird. We have never skipped lunch at the same before and the only other time was on our first day when we had to control Jasper so he didn't kill anyone. That was hard.

I walked over to Jessica to find out if anything happened. I had been covering up peoples thoughts by singing Emmett's favourite song, if you can call it that, the llama song. I inwardly shivered at the thought of what happened when he first heard it. **(When Emmett first heard the llama song is on my friends **

**account, Emmett and the Illama Song (she can't spell, don't worry it's not me) by cullenist-here, it's **_**very**_** funny!) **

"Please may I sit here?" I politely asked Jessica.

"S-sure," I chuckled at the response Jessica moved up to make space between her and Eric but I quickly slotted myself on the end next to Angela. She smiled politely at me but then turned back to Ben and I saw that they were lost in each other's eyes. I looked away to give them some privacy and started talking to Jessica. God, this girl was stupid. I have a fiancée and she is still flirting, extreme style at one point she wanted to sit on my knee! She is _very_ scary.

At that moment Mike walked in sick all over him, blood all over his face, his nose pushed in his face and to the side shouting, "Now that's the end of Bella for you Edward, see how she likes you or anyone else now." Ending with an evil laugh. Now this was even scarier than Jessica.

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Sorry for the shortness, but I just wanted to get a chapter out before tomorrow, I might not be able to update. Please review and read my other story :P...

edward.x.cullen.x.forever

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	7. Superman? Kinky

Disclaimer

_This is a disclaimer for the chapter._

_I am not Stephanie Meyer therefore I do_

_Not own any of the characters in this._

_I wish I did own Edward but sadly I do _

_Not. WHY? WHY? _

**Superman? Kinky**

**BPOV **

**(On their wedding day) I am very sorry that it took this long.. it is the last chapter because I didn't know where to go from there I skipped forward so you can find out what happened easier :P... enjoy...**

Edward and I were sitting at the head of the table. Edward, I and our families had all finished making our toasts and were now remembering some of my 'human experiences' before I lost my humanity tonight. Emmett had just finished telling his story about him walking in on me trying to seduce Edward; even though everyone laughed I didn't find that funny! In a week I will no longer be a virgin or so they thought.

"Oh my gawd... I just remembered the funniest human experience ever. I mean this human experience, of Bella's, totally beats Emmett's raccoon incident, Rosalie's day without make-up, Esme's horse and dog thing and my trying to escape the funny farm dressed up as a chicken pot pie, ALL PUT TOGETHER!" Alice shrieked the last part and the whole table turned to look at us before they all carried on with their separate conversations.

"What would this be Alice because I don't believe it could be funnier than Emmett and the raccoon," Jasper barley made out through his laughter. I turned to see Emmett sending Jasper death glares but it still didn't shut him up.

"You know Jazz- I'll give you a clue, Mr. Banner thought inappropriately about Bella, Bella had to talk to him about erection's, then Edward broke Mike's nose, then Edward ran away, then I had my vision, then Bella kissed Mike, then Bella throw up on Mike, then Bella ran away, then Jessica flirted with Edward, then Mike ran around school claiming Bella as his, then Edward heard-" ,Alice was stopped quickly by Edward butting in.

"I didn't really find that lunch very hilarious," but by the time he had finished this sentence the whole of the Cullen's were rolling on the floor laughing, except from Edward and I, they were obviously recalling that lunch's events. After about 20 minutes they had all settled themselves but the topic still wasn't dropped.

"Edward you didn't let me finish, remember after Mike's little lunch visit to you ran everywhere to find Bella and when you couldn't find her you went mad and ran around everywhere and when you found us you shouted, WHERE THE HELL IS BELLA! So loud and we were all worried and then-," Alice was once again interrupted.

"It's not my fault I didn't look there it wasn't the first place I thought I had to look," Edward was trying to defend himself, I quickly pecked him on the cheek for his efforts.

"So, Mr. Banner thought all that stuff about Bella and was locked in his so you didn't think maybe he could have-"

"Well, I'm sorry but I didn't expect a teacher to do that!"

"This is Mr. Banner we are talking about Eddiekins, you know the one that wouldn't stop imagining Bella NAKED!"

Everyone at the table looked at us but Alice and Edward were still glaring at each other, so they all just turned back and engaged in their own conversations.

"Yes, well I though he would just go and give himself a wank and then leave and only imagine Bella not try and kidnap her!" I have never heard Edward say the word wank before and it was actually making him sound more seductive than usual. God, he is so hot!, "Anyway Alice you should have seen it!"

"You should have heard it!"

"How could I have heard it, when he saw her walking past him and took her!"

"Exactly a snap decision so I could never have seen it!"

"You didn't see it for about an hour so later, I could have heard it quicker if he wasn't so far away!"

"His house is not that far away Edward!"

"Even if I did her his thoughts at his house we wouldn't know where it was unless you had a vision!"

"We could go into the office and get information if you had just concentrated more!"

"I was concentrating more than you were Alice all you could do was snog Jasper!" At this point they were hissing the sentences at each other so I could barely hear but Emmett looked like he was having fun his head was going from each person at each exchange of words with a big grin on his face.

"Just because I can please when you refuse to with Bella doesn't mean I can't do it!"

"I want to please Bella but I can at least I wait until 4 days while when your best friend is missing you go have fun with Jasper, instead of trying to find her!"

"I did try and find her but when I got upset Jasper made me happier!"

"So instead of trying to find your friend you went and had fun with Jasper to make you happy while Bella was upset and tied up in Mr. Banner's house?"

I felt it time to but in before something bad happens but Esme beat me to it, "All that matters is that Edward got Bella back in time, even though I didn't appreciate the way he handled the situation once he had got th-"

"WHAT?! Mum, come on give the man props breaking one nose for Edward was a big deal but breaking Mr. Banner's arms was just topping on the whole cake!" Emmett exclaimed but his grin was wiped of his face by Rosalie hitting his head, "Ow!"

"I am sorry Esme, it was just that I wanted to hit something so bad and he just happened to be in the way," I gave him another peck on the cheek for his efforts but continued eating my last meal.

"Edward," Alice started, "I have never been able to see what you did at the house because you told us not to come and I can't see in my visions what happened, would you mind explaining?" Alice had perked up and was innocently looking batting her eyebrows at him.

"Nope," he smiled, looked at me and winked. Alice wouldn't even want to know what happened after Edward was finished with Mr. Banner and I still couldn't decide if I wanted her to or not.

"Please Eddie," Alice and Emmett pleaded at the same time both using their best puppy eyes until Alice face looked into space. She was having a vision.

"She's having a vision," Jasper qualified. Now she was going to get what she wanted, and I was going to have fun watching her go through it.

"We better put her in a different room," Edward mumbled before we excused ourselves and moved her onto the balcony.

**APOV**

_-Vision-_

_I was sitting in a small, old furnished room. When I noticed Bella in the middle with her eyes clasped shut when I saw Mr. Banner come out of another room and walked over to Bella in a way I presumed was supposed to be seductive. _

"_Bella, I have something hot for you and it's not just me," Mr. Banner PURRED! I couldn't stop laughing when I saw Mr. Banner open Bella's eyes and she stared in awe as she saw him use pink, fluffy handcuffs to tie her to the chair._

"_So Mr. Banner likes it kinky," I said between laughs not caring who heard me at the wedding._

_Then the most disturbing thing I have ever seen in my entire life happened- human and vampire- my Mr. Banner turned music on, 'Stripper Song by Jamaican Joint' and started dancing while taking off his tie slowly. At first I was way too shocked to react I couldn't even close my eyes but then I burst out laughing. Poor Bella. She was just sitting there and looked so scared, but I couldn't move to help her. Mr. Banner was walking towards her. His tie, shoes, socks and shirt were off leaving him only in his trousers walking closer and closer towards a petrified Bella. He was right in front of Bella, singing along with the song and unbuttoning his trousers slowly then quickly pulled down is zipper exposing a pair of superman underwear. This brought on another fit of giggles as he pulled down his trousers, which left him standing there in his underwear slowly circling a very scared Bella._

"_Your breast on my shoulder," he sang into her ear, "Do you want to try that Bella, I know you do, you have been eyeing me up ever since you stepped into this school and I have wanted you ever since," I burst out laughing but stopped to her what he was whispering in her ear, "Edward never has to know it can be our little secret."_

_MR BANNER JUST PURRED THAT IN HR EAR. I burst out laughing again and just watched as he started to take off the shoulder jacket Bella had on, stroking her skin. _

"_EDWARD!" Bella screamed suddenly at the top of her lungs. I felt bad for her. She was so scared and Edward wasn't here to save her and she didn't know what to do. I could easily just break his neck and it would be over but Bella could barely snap a stick, unless of course she tripped over it._

"_Don't worry Bella, he's not going to find us, we are all alone," I saw Bella shiver as his hand moved slowly down he body until it stopped at the end of her skirt. Maybe I won't make her wear a skirt to school again. Just at that moment Edward broke down the door looking extremely pissed._

"_GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY FIANCEE YOU FUCKING PERVERT!" Edward screamed at the top of his lungs and ran over to Mr. Banner and twisted his arm back._

"_Say sorry," he hissed._

"_No. I won't because I know she liked it," I saw Edward's lips pull up into a smirk before I heard a loud snap and a cry._

"_I said say sorry," once again hissing and he picked up Mr. Banner's other arm. _

"_Edward, this is not going to make me give you a good report now is it, and I will say once again Bella-," he purred her name and I saw this was a big mistake because again came another snap and cry._

"_Fine, I'm sorry Bella," he once again purred her name. Couldn't this man take a hint? Edward growled under his breath before punching Mr. Banner... there was silence and I noticed Mr. Banner was unconscious. _

_I couldn't help it I belted out, "Go Edward, that was so COOL!" I'm sure he heard it, I would have to say that to him again to show I actually meant it._

"_I'm so sorry Bella are you okay, I should never have left just his thoughts were screaming at me and I couldn't stop them-" _

"_Edward stop, I'm just glad you came in time, please can you untie me?" Bella asked. Edward moved towards Bella slowly and ripped the handcuffs swiftly of her hands and then leaned in and whispered in her ear._

"_You know Bella all day I have had images of you naked in my head and way you could get naked and now I really want to see you naked in real life not just in my imagination," whispered, I mean purred! Edward just told Bella he wanted to see her naked._

"_Well, Edward why don't you look because you know I have been wondering what you look like without your clothes on ever since you came in the room and saved me," then I saw Bella's hands move toward Edward's shirt and pull it over his head._

"_GET ME OUT OF HERE!" I screamed at the top of my lungs I did not want to see Bella and Edward lose their virginity. But I knew I couldn't leave my vision until I had seen all I needed and apparently I needed to see this._

_It had been 30 minutes and Bella was still sitting on the chair naked and was now pulling of Edward's last remaining piece of cloth that was covering him. _

"_HOLY SHIT! THATS MASSIVE!" I couldn't help but exclaim at the sight of it, at least double the size of Jaspers and defiantly larger than Emmett's. Shit, I have got to get Jasper some of that growing stuff for it so I don't keep on imagining Edward's instead._

"_Are you ready?" I heard Edward whisper and I saw Bella nod, "I love you."_

"_I love you, too."_

_-End Vision-_

"YOU TWO ARNT VIRGINS!?" I shrieked at them as soon I came back to reality. My whole families eyes were on Edward and Bella. Bella was as red as a fire truck and Edward had a slight smirk on his face.

"I knew it, Jasper give me 100 bucks," Emmett held his hand out to Jasper, "They were way too touchy feely after Mr. Banner's house!"

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**Thank you for reading it and sticking with me till the end :P Please Review :D**

**Lots of hugs,**

**edward.x.cullen.x.forever**

**.x.o.x.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o.x.o**


	8. What Did That Mean?

Disclaimer

_This is a disclaimer for the chapter._

_I am not Stephanie Meyer therefore I do_

_Not own any of the characters in this._

_I wish I did own Edward but sadly I do _

_Not. WHY? WHY? _

**What did that mean?**

**APOV**

**This is going to be really short just a little bit when Alice is trying to explain to Emmett, Jasper and Rosalie the things she was saying while having the vision. Very short... literally Q&A...**

"Alice, we were wondering if you would explain why you were shrieking things while you were in 'vision mode'" Emmett asked as soon as Esme, Carlisle, Bella and Edward went back to the dinner.

"Here's the deal, you can say one thing I said and then I will tell you why I said it, deal?" I stuck out my pinky, Emmett and Rosalie shook it and I held it to Jasper.

"Cant I have two, because I love you so much?" He kissed me gently and I knew I couldn't deny him.

"Okay," he shook my pinky and as soon as we did Emmett began to jump up and down saying, "I get to go first!" repeatedly.

"What's your option, Emmett?" I asked.

"I want to know why you said, 'Mr. Banner likes it kinky'! Please tell me!"

"Emmett, I said that because Mr. Banner did a strip tease to a _dirty _song, while singing the lyrics to Bella, then strapped her to the chair with pink, fluffy handcuffs, AND he was wearing..." I paused to see Emmett's reaction, which was him looking down at me wide eyed with a big grin on his face, "Superman Boxers!" With that we all laughed but stopped as Jasper went to ask the next question.

"Then you said, 'Go Edward, that was so cool!"

"Jazzy, I said that because Edward just broke Mr. Banner's arms and knocked him unconscious," I gave him a quick peck on the cheek and turned to Rosalie.

"I have got mine. You screamed 'Get me out of here'. Why?" I sent her the 'they lost their virginity why else would I scream get me out of here' look. She nodded and then grimaced. "I'm sorry you had to see that," the she patted my back.

"See what?" Emmett pouted, "I feel so left out."

"Emmy, Edward and Bella had sex, or made love in Edward terms, why else would she scream that?"

"Oh, I get it... I'm sorry you had to go through that," he said while smirking.

"So what's your last request, hubby?" I asked Jasper.

"This is one I am most confused about you shouted, 'Holy shit. That's massive!"

"Well, Jasper lets just say it was at least double the size of yours and Emmett's, by what Rosalie has said, and you are going to need to buy some of that growing stuff for yours." I ended and Emmett and Jasper looked very confused while Rosalie looked in shock.

"Edward cannot be that big!"

"Oh, yes he can sis, I am talking bigger than Emmett and Jasper's put together times 5!"

"I knew I should have got Edward when I had the chance."

"You two are disguising, and Alice I am not putting any of that stuff down there you can look at Edward's massive one all you want!" Jasper obviously figured it out.

Rosalie and I burst out laughing while Jasper sulked off.

Emmett looked really confused, "What is so massive I don't get it?"


	9. DECISION

**_I need help deciding which story, from 3 different ones, i should write next. Please, could you read the summarys and first chapters on my fanfiction 'Decision' and vote in my poll, or say your decision in a review, on which you want me to write next. _**

**_Thanks for helping,_**

edward (.) x (.) cullen (.) x (.) forever 


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